Welp, it finally happened…
President Donald Trump has offered Lawrence Kudlow the job as director of the National Economic Council and he accepted, making the economic commentator one of the president’s top economic advisers, Mr. Kudlow said in an interview.
The appointment could be announced Thursday, Mr. Kudlow said. He would replace Gary Cohn, the investment banker who quit the White House last week after losing out in a battle over tariffs on U.S. steel and aluminum imports.
“Kuddles” has not had a government job since the Reagan administration, but has instead spent the next decades selling supply-side economics on TV. Essentially, Larry is almost a negative proof of Gary Cohn. He hasn’t worked on Wall Street since he got canned from Bear Stearns in 1994, is not the kind of guy that has the real pulse of finance’s most powerful CEOs and has never been good at being the quiet power in the room.
What Larry is, though, is what appeals to the stilted animal brain of a man who seems somehow frozen in the late 80s/early 90s; he’s a New York City bold-faced name who can pop up on Page Six with the same relevancy that he pops up on CNBC to whine about how taxes and regulation make everything worse. He’s a niche celebrity, messaging master and shameless self-promoter. The man co-hosted a TV show with Jim Cramer for fucks sake.
And if you don’t agree that choosing Kudlow is at least partly a case of one gauche NYC celeb seeking comfort in another, look at how this hiring apparently went down. Per Ben White’s Twitter:
Trump offered the job over the phone to @larry_kudlow while Kudlow was at dinner last night at Cipriani in Manhattan. Kudlow accepted and will start ASAP.
— Ben White (@morningmoneyben) March 14, 2018
And Eamon Javers just went on CNBC (a network that has spent the last hour auto-fellating itself for having employed Larry all these years) saying that Kudlow actually took Trump’s call at Cipriani, left the restaurant and called Trump back from an Uber. Apparently he gushed to Javers that the Uber driver was amazed that the guy in the backseat was on the phone with the president!
Umm, what the actual fuck? You just got offered the chance to save the American economy, Larry. Why are you acting like the douchey protagonist of a Cindy Adams column? And how did Romana Singer not get involved?
Wall Street is nevertheless psyched that a veteran free market, bank stan like Larry is next up to be ignored by Trump. In fairness, he’s almost certainly a better debater than Gary Cohn and he understands how to talk to Trump. If all else fails, he can at the very least get Donald to focus by reminiscing about some hot waitress they both used to hit on during lunch at The Quilted Giraffe.
In the end, who really cares? Larry is reportedly telling people that this a one-year gig, so he’ll almost certainly be out of the White House by Labor Day, leaving The Donald to choose between Maria Bartiromo and Charlie Gasparino as his third NEC director in two years.