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Larry Kudlow Pissing Off The West Wing By Being Larry Kudlow

Larry Kudlow Pissing Off The West Wing By Being Larry Kudlow

When Larry Kudlow joined Trump’s White House, we felt the cheapest of dirty thrills envisioning all the quality infotainment TV moments that he would create in the few short weeks that his tenure would inevitably last.

Because you don’t hire Kuddles for his economic knowledge and quiet counsel, you hire Kuddles to get that TV smarm offensive of slicked back hair, incandescent pastel tie, name-dropping and drippingly condescending sound bites about “King Dollar.” You also don’t bring Larry Kudlow in to keep things copacetic, you do it to shake shit up because Larry Kudlow is a diva who loves to put on a show.

To get the best out of Larry Kudlow, he needs proper care. You feed him attention and let him go on TV every other day because he needs camera time like a plant needs sunlight. You also need to treat him like a star, because Kuddles is a veteran niche celebrity who ignores the “niche” part. Like any adorable Mogwai, you need to follow very clear rules when dealing with Larry Kudlow, lest you end up with a gremlin furiously demanding that La Goulue takeout be sent all the way to Washington DC.

And according to Vanity Fair, it looks like the Trump Administration is already gambling with its handling of our pal Kuddles:

Kudlow has also tangled with Kelly. Recently, according to sources, Kudlow told press secretary Sarah Huckabee Sanders that he would like his own press person. Sanders explained that the press office could handle his media and that he didn’t need a dedicated person. “Larry was like, I’m not asking for permission,” a person briefed on the conversation said. When Kelly found out about Kudlow’s request, he blocked it. Kudlow, according to sources, didn’t force the issue with Kelly. But he wasn’t happy about it. “Larry was like, what the fuck does this guy know about the economy?” a person who spoke with him said.

Wow. We don’t think Larry has been this dismissive of a new colleague’s economic IQ since he started that show with Jim Cramer. And even more of an eyebrow raiser is the idea that Sarah Huckabee Sanders is so deeply misreading Larry’s wants and needs. If she thinks Larry will rest one moment until he installs Kayla Tausche as the NEC spokesperson, she’s got another thing coming.

Larry Kudlow is only useful if he’s Larry Kudlow, and he can only be that if he’s treated like Larry Kudlow. So The White House better install a live feed camera in his office and let FoxBiz, CNBC and Bloomberg watch…

Friends of Kudlow have warned him not to do much television for fear of inciting Trump’s jealousy. “You can’t outshine the master. The minute you tell Trump you’re good on TV, you’re done,” the first former official said.

Nice job, John Kelly, you just got Kuddles wet and fed him after midnight. Enjoy the meltdown.

“HE’S SITTING THERE BITCHING AND MOANING’’: INSIDE TRUMPWORLD, ALLIES FEAR THE BOSS COULD GO POSTAL AND FIRE MUELLER [HIVE]

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